Tuesday, June 22, 2004


Zing! The toaster calls to me for more bread. I hurry to the bakery and get some nice red jelly tarts, but no bread. I'll be damned if a toaster is gonna tell me what to do. Zing, it says, like a half baked monkey in a grocer's freezer. I want bread, I eat breat, bread is the bread of life. Carbs are cool. I weigh 280 pounds today. Zing, says my aorta. Gotta lose some weight, and fast. No more red jelly tarts for me, oh, I'll eat half of yours then.


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